Sinckler Theory

Little known fact about me: despite my current loves and direction work wise I have a BSc. in Management. As such every year for 3 years I was reminded of Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs and a host of other management theories. These should all be abolished now for I’ve found one that works better than any other. I call this The Democratic policy or more commonly refered to as the Sinckler plan. The Sinkler plan is quite simple: if it fails or causes employees to suffer just blame the previous administration. It also allows you to give a raise but implement new compulsory company laws to take the money back. All moneys saved should then be spent on pomp and pageantry.

Under the Sinckler management Theory there is never enough money to go around and this is due to the spending of the previous bosses. However for Grammys and any regal events money is to be spent at will. This shows that a company’s biggest responsibility is entertainment. However employees have had their individual powers to entertain taken from them. No expense should be spared for the impressing of the external high profile customers. However internal customers must be made to understand that previous management is to blame for all your errors.

The Sinckler Theory came about out of the need for change and is quite akin to George Orwell’s Animal Farm. Things worked well under previous administrations but with smoke screens and misguidance a bevy of issues were made to appear in place. After the ousting of the previous management the new one then proceeded to add on and magnify the old issues. A list of laws and promises were made and none were met as yet. When the highly unqualified management team was asked why it was stated it was the previous management’s fault. Thus Sinckler’s Theory was born.

I for one am going to adopt this with all aspects of my life. If a female and I have issues I will blame it on the previous boyfriend. If I can’t meet a time deadline I will blame it on the previous employee. If I run a red light I will blame it on the car that went before me. Sinckler’s Theory will lead me forward from in plenty to a time of need.