Sniff Sniff

I want to start today’s very brief and short post with a short story. The names have been altered to protect the innocent but the situation is very real and very frequently occurring: “Something smells funny” stated young Nala, but no matter how she searched for the smell she couldn’t quite locate it. The smell seemed to follow Nala everywhere she went until it became normal to her and she no longer smelt it. The smell however was clear to all those around her. The smell of corporate B.S. orally ingested through repetitive butt-kissing.

They say do what you must to get ahead in life. Machiavelli is accredited with the concept of “The Ends Justify The Means.” However what does a man really stand for if he bends over to the whims and fancies of another person just to get ahead? He who tries to get ahead in this way may or may not succeed and whilst their attempts are to be lovable by some, they may come across as just full of bull to others.

News carriers such as the Nation, Barbados Advocate and Barbados Today also have problems with the likes of Nala as they leave nothing to the unknown. Their tendency to report, distort and exaggerate reports to gain favor in management’s concubine ranking makes the news reporting skills of CNN seem like you were reading the Investigator.

To each their own I always say so I shouldn’t be bother with the tactics of those who prefer lips to cheeks work that knuckles in the dirt work to get to the top. However it suits me better to not be surrounded with the stench of feces causing me to be alienated from my peers. So whilst I prefer to place my lips on those of a suitable and sexy female’s mouth, others prefer to place on the cheeks of anyone who is in a high position.

No Action Transport Only

I want to take this moment to give a big shout out to the kindest gentlemen there are out there. The brothers of the benevolent group we shall refer to as NATO. These gentlemen make sure that ladies get where there are going safely and free of cost. In an era where it is expected that some form of payment be it monetary, oral or private be given in return for transportation services, it is good that these gentlemen take the time to drop whatever there are doing to transport the beautiful ladies of the world around.

Very few males intentionally sign up for NATO. Member got in to the agreement with hopes of the A in NATO being a positive. However as time wore on the N joined the A and the agreement gets an O as it becomes contractual. There are even situations where the members of NATO would forego getting some A in their life and rushing off to ensure that our beautiful ladies get to their destination.

NATO officers cover a wide range of duties. These vary from the delivery of food to the transportation to food; taking to and from fetes without staying in some cases; transportation to and from work and in extreme situations the taking of females to receive A from their significant others or buddies. These duties are very key to the lives of females and so we can see why NATO members are so key.

Many people cry down the members of NATO and look to make fun of them for their benevolence but who are we to judge? Even in these times where gas prices are skyrocketing these gentlemen are happily traversing long miles to ensure that females are safe in their travels. The only detriment of NATO members is their potential to be psycho stalkers. This is usually the case with those who fail to realize that they are members of NATO and when the A is given to other people they get bitter, upset and murderous.

So I’d like to take the time to give the NATO force a thank you award for their duties instead of the other crying downs that they receive. Females need to know that they can get around safely in these times where gas and crime rates are rising rapidly. Also those males who live far from their females and don’t have transportation are happy that they can have their significant others delivered to them safely. So let’s all raise our cups for the members of NATO.

Red Means Stop

Before I wrote this blog I was hoping I could find a Barbados Road Traffic Rules and Regulations book to be sure I hadn’t been taught the wrong when I did my regulations test. I always thought and assumed that when you came to a red light that you stopped. However I am hearing these days that this is a conditional situation. Apparently it is ok to run a red light if you are familiar with the junction that you are at.

There is a school of thought that if you need to be somewhere in a hurry that it might be ok to run the junction. When the lights are red apparently the junction is invitingly ready for you to fly through. The added dangers add an air of excitement that make the driving experience even better and more fun. It is truly a mind-blowing experience for the dare devil in us all.

For some reason this logic doesn’t sit well with what I learnt. I envision a scene straight from E.R. with blood all over the place as a result of running such red light. Then to be ostracized by society for such reckless driving seems not worth the waiting 4-7 seconds for the light to change. The only time that I can see me running a red light are those very rare situations when you are in a hurry and you reach the light on amber.

You’ve travelled on average 28 miles. Some miles will be better than others and some will not be so why not use these few seconds to relax and prepare for the next 28 miles? Some drivers have also adopted the basis of being able to read the lights at their usual junction and having a side route to get keep them constantly rolling. This generally gains them a few extra miles but severe accidents have been known to occur when routes cross.

My advice to all the drivers out there is simply to enjoy the 28 miles and take a rest for this few seconds the lights are on red. Green go, amber slow and red means stop.

Letting A Secret Out

Does your man love you? a lot of you who just said yes are mistaken and I will explain below:

So today I was asked if I could have sex with an ugly female and my answer led to this blog. Firstly to answer the question the answer is yes I can have sex with an ugly lady. Any man that says he can’t is a liar. The question that needs to be asked is would you have sex with an ugly lady. The reason that the answer is yes for all males is that we have a genetic defect that allows us to put less importance on looks for sexual arousal. The fact that we can be aroused when we don’t want to is the cause of a lot of harm for some men. In the right pair of underwear merely lapping your legs can cause you to stand at attention.

That in its most basic of senses is how women can tell when we love you and don’t love having sex with you. By default a man is 75% horny, so to get him ready for action is a small task. If your man is willing to talk to you on the phone for long periods of time then yes he loves you. If he invites you over even when it is that time of month or if he cuddles and talks to you when on red and he doesn’t mind then yes he loves you (oh we know when your period is due better than you after the 1st few months together when we care, it’s self preservation at its best).

So ladies if you realize that boy’s night is always period time then your man is in it for the sauce and not you. if he doesn’t like the phone etc so conversations are usually in person and end up with some form of sex cause you’re too irresistible then you just s steady booty call. If he pauses call of duty to have sex with you then he likes having sex with you. If he stops totally then he loves you.
To put it simply a man finds time for those things he loves. Be it sports, food or a lady. if it is you he loves he’ll find time for you. if it’s the sex then he’ll find time for that.